50+ Funny Wedding Wishes, Messages and Quotes


Funny Wedding Wishes Messages

Getting married is like being in drama school You get to practice everything from comedy to melodrama to tragedy Congratulations

I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep ones wife happy First let her think shes having her own way And second let her have it Lyndon B Johnson

Love seems the swiftest but it is the slowest of all growths No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century Mark Twain

Marriage A legal or religious ceremony by which two persons of the opposite sex solemnly agree to harass and spy on each other for ninetynine years or until death do them join Elbert Hubbard

Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water After you get used to it it aint so hot Minnie Pearl

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open Groucho Marx

Theres a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking Its called marriage James Holt McGavran

Marriage is when a man loses his bachelor8217s degree and a woman gets her master8217s degree

When a man opens the car door for his wife its either a new car or a new wife Prince Philip

Before you got married you were madly in love with each other Now you will8217be mad at each other as well

This is what I have to say to you You are a very brave soul who will endure the marriage life and become better than all of us Godspeed my friend We got your back

Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia The mafia wants either your money or life Wives want both

Marriage has no guarantees If thats what youre looking for go live with a car battery Erma Bombeck

A man is incomplete until he is married After that he is finished Zsa Zsa Gabor

Do you know that you are signing a marriage contract which does not give you the option of renewing it every year Congratulations on signing your life away

In life we should always keep our eyes wide open However after marriage its better to close them Congratulations and Good Luck

Congratulations on your wedding day8230 I haven8217t bothered buying you both a present It would just be something else to fight over when you get divorced

Thank you so much for the free food and drinks I will always say my prayers to God for you May He bless you at the beginning of the end for you Congratulations and good luck with everything

I hope God bless you with an amazing memory to remember all the important dates and not make your partner angry Sending my best wishes at your marriage life mate

Getting married is like becoming a child all over again Be prepared to learn where to put your towel how to keep the bathroom clean and organizing your clothes in the closet Congratulations

You are so excited to make your partner happy and loved always Then you will find out that you did nothing but annoy each other instead Congratulations

Maybe your I do will not cost you your sanity Have fun in your married life Sending my best wishes to both of you at surviving life May God bless you dear

Hope you have fun at your personalized wrestling match for life Best wishes guys May God bless you two together and be with you always Love you a lot

I still cannot believe someone willingly married you Sending all my best wishes and condolences for him to tolerate you 247 Hope you have fun together Love yaa

No ones ever able to find out a secret about happy married life I guess it doesnt even exist Happy Married Life Brother

Marriage marks the end of a love story and the start of a wrestling match Wishing you the very best of everything anyway

May you enjoy your epic sleepover with your person for the rest of your life I pray to God to keep both of you safe from each other Have a great life together Love you

I hope you enjoy the circus of this lifetime and make sure to squeeze the fun out of it Stay in love stay married Also remember to SCREAM whenever it is needed Love you tons

FINALLY I mean yeah congratulations on your wedding I hope your life drama be more comedy than some melodrama Good luck with everything Best wishes

Do you know what late nights parties and hanging out with friends on the weekend have in common You wont be able to do any of those from now on Congratulations for your wedding

Well now its the beginning of the end for you No more beers no more night out with the guys but at least you have a loving wife Congrats

I canceled all my appointments and an important meeting just so that I could make it to your wedding After all free food and booze were just too lucrative to give up Congratulations

Congratulations for embarking on lifes journey called MARRIAGE which is either a two way street between COMPROMISE and SACRIFICE or a one way street to DIVORCE

In the circus of life you may have lived like a lion so far But your wife the new circus master will tame you into a domesticated cat in no time Good luck with your tight rope act

There is nothing worse than a friend getting married Now my parents have one more reason to coax me into getting married Congratulations

Congratulations on your nuptials I am really happy that you have found your person you want to annoy for the rest of your life and be happy about it Love you two so much

Hope you stay madly in love just don8217t get mad in this marriage Best wishes for the crazy wonderful and dangerous world of marriage Sending my prayers

Dear friend congratulations on getting married for real Hope you speak now or forever hold your peace May God be with you throughout all the bumpy ride

Just wanted to remind you that deaf husbands and blind wives make the best pairs Hope you have a great married life with your partner Sending you all my best wishes mate

A couples life cycle consists of various stages dating loving marrying fighting threatening and possibly even divorcing Congratulations on reaching step number three

Marriage the lone warfare where you have to sleep with your enemy and the next day you have to talk happily without caring how much you were disturbed last time Good luck Happy Marriage

Congratulations on your wedding may you always be able to put up with each other

Hope you will not grow up just because now you are married Have a blessed and happy life

I would like to send you my best wishes on your lifelong contract Congratulations

Your laughter will be dead Your rejoicing will be nullified Theres going to be just one voice at home now And that is of your wifes Happy married life

You are actually shown some respect when priests ask you to say I do Else its not that you have any other choice either Happy Married Life Ahead

Two become One one bed one remote one bathroom Congratulations on your union as life partners

No amount of wishes or luck will protect you from the painful life of slavery you are about to start as a husband Congratulations anyway

I knew you two were madly in love with each other but didnt think that youll be mad enough to marry Have a great life ahead

Congratulations and best of luck on continuing to ignore the little annoying things



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